Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Second Chances?

I want to jump in with both feet.  Love with abandon.  Move in to the home we bought together but never got to live in together.  Decorate. Plan.  Dream. Live. 

A fresh start; a second chance.  Basically, I want to run back to Fantasyland where everything is all pretty roses- and no thorns.

I wouldn’t say I’m scared.  I no longer live based on fear. But, I am cautious.  I know my tendency to make decisions based on emotion.  To jump into things too fast because my heart runs way ahead of my head.

Yes, you said everything I wanted to hear.  I’ve even seen evidence- “fruits of repentance” and all of that.  We are getting along perfectly.  Things are great.  It’s like it was in the beginning- before the trials, trauma, tragedy, or the mundane chores of the daily grind came our way.


Is it a second honeymoon period?  Will we go back to that dark, ugly, desperate place?  Worse than roommates.  Enemies, really.  I don’t want to go back.  I won’t go back. 

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